Anonymous said: How does one become Canadian?
First one must move to Canada. Consumption of large quantities of maple syrup and poutine help manifest these changes and expedite them. Usually it is best to obtain a Canadian pet as well, Moose, beaver and geese are popular options for new comers.
Following this, one must sing the Canadian National Anthem on each full moon and new moon of the month for one year whilst bathing in maple syrup mixed with melted snow water.
This process is observed by a government official who will decide if the transformation ritual has been successfully completed. If not the hopeful is expelled. If so, they are taken to Hudson’s Bay where a secret and closely guarded ritual is performed, completing the transformation once and for all into a Canadian.